He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Reggie can tackle my bush.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
