it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
she woke up with a sticky ear
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize
