Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
