rhymes with "ouble enetration"
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
