I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
