I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
