S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
