yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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