Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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