I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I feel great
I just peed on a car
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
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