We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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