you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
