She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Randomize
