Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
