Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Randomize
