We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical�
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
