O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Randomize
