if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
