hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
