im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
