Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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