I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
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