is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
where does the pee come out of this thing
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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