i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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