I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
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