i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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