I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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