do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Randomize
