I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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