Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Randomize
