Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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