quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Be still, my beating vagina.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
