I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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