i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
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