no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Randomize
