She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
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