she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Randomize
