Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Randomize
