i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
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