Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
