hotel room ftw
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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