That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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