Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Randomize
