all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize
