But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
