Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
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