it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
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