He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
