turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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