okay pat passed out under dana's car
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
